State of the King's Realm

"The Gentry are all round, stand up now, stand up now,   

The Gentry are all round, stand up now;  

The Gentry are all round, on each side they are found,  

Their wisdom's so profound to cheat us of our ground.  

Stand up now, stand up now…"

~ The Diggers Song 

I am not by nature a political creature. The daily comings and goings of Lord Obama and the Gentry are best left to the warbling imagination of far-wing dogmamongers. On occasion, per my want, I take notice.

The proletarians and petit-bourgeois of the Realm can’t help but question our Queen’s recent activities, especially as they seem to contradict the King's Will.

“Everyone must sacrifice for the greater good… Everyone must have some skin in the game,” His Majesty proclaimed ere He signed His ineffectual $787 billion stimulus bill into law in 2009.

What shall be sacrificed if not creature comforts? Does everyone recall Thermostatgate?

The capital flew into a bit of a tizzy when, on his first full day in the White House, President Obama was photographed in the Oval Office without his suit jacket. There was, however, a logical explanation: Mr. Obama, who hates the cold, had cranked up the thermostat. ~ Dave Burdick , The Huffington Post 

Lord Obama is best known as our Traveling King, oft departed from New Camelot in a bid to find the Holy Grail. He has visited all fifty-seven States of the Realm, treating his subjects to upbeat speeches and blue promises, and He has visited those States several times over. During his reign, the Royal Family has enjoyed lavish trips to Europe. There have been delightful vacations in Hawaii. His Majesty once treated His admirable Queen to a romantic dinner in Chicago. And now our beloved Lady has taken the Royal Princesses to ski.

How can we begrudge the Queen her respite? The strain of New Camelot is great, and the King's “personal fiscal prudency” proclamations only apply to peasants and their snot-caked brats. Surely the subjects will not mind treating the Princesses to a ski trip. It allows them to get out of the castle and mingle with the subjects. Exposure at a young age can lead to lasting positive impressions.

The petit-bourgeois, already straining to make ends meet, are not pleased with these arrangements. Their mortgages oppressively hang over them; they did not spend beyond their means and thus they do not qualify for the King’s “assistance”. Their elderly and their disabled are slowly starving because the King would not bend his mind towards an increase in their promised-pensions. Their wounded soldiers suffer from the same oversight. The price of a Royal Skiing trip would equate to several house payments, more than three month’s groceries and perhaps a new winter coat for the missus and children. The petit-bourgeois have cut back on their spending, per Lord Obama’s command, but to what end?

 




King Barack, Queen Elizabeth II, Queen Michelle, Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh. The Royal couple visited the Court of Lilliput before moving on to Brobdingnag.

 

My thanks to Steffanie Lochim for the "oil paintings". I could not locate the artist to give them proper credit.

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With Christmas Around the Corner...

Has anyone noticed that…

My Thanksgiving “leaves” are still festooning my front door…

Plastic tubs brimming with jolly ornaments are cluttering up my dining room and pose a hazard to passersby…

The dogs are pooping little artificial tree “needles” because I haven’t vacuumed in a week…

Don ‘t worry, it won’t kill them. They’ve pooped worse.

Honestly.

Has anyone noticed that each passing year places more importance upon being the first in the family, on the block or at the office to decorate, shop, ship and send out cards?

Have you noticed how more significance is placed on banning nativities, posting anti-Christian billboards meant to dissuade “fellow atheists” from “believing” (their rebuttal, not mine) or how we are not to say “Merry Christmas” for fear of offending all those people that spend December 25 in a furious celebration, replete with Santa Claus and a Christmas dinner? Shame on those bad people.

For that matter, I couldn’t help but notice that my wonderful Wiccan, Buddhist, Jewish and Muslim friends have all sent me online Christmas cards (I am so far behind that I haven’t dug out my own card list yet!) Have you ever wondered exactly who “Merry Christmas” is supposed to offend? I certainly have.

Happy Chanukah, by the way. Tonight is the final night and I have greatly enjoyed reading my friend Leslie’s daily updates (her kids had a good haul this year and we are all very pleased that her oldest son was asked to sing Haneirot Halalu last night. :::coughSENDVIDEOcough::: Thank you very much.)

She pointed out in a lengthy email that the "rebel atheists" don't seem to give much though towards banning “Jewish children’s brainwashing books”. These little novelties have wonderful titles such as The Runaway Dreidel and The Tie Man’s Miracle | A Chanukah Tale.

“Meh. Who would bother to do such a thing, I ask you? They have hutzpa, I’ll give them that. It’s the same, world-over. People like that are no good, and no good comes of them. Selfish me, me, me and myself, and I. You [Christians] say to them to give up being a shmok to be self-less. Big burden on them, I tell you. G-d forbid they give to the poor or take in orphans. So they get angry at Christians. Or maybe feel guilty. Feh. May they win the lottery and spend every last dime on a new lawn, and then may a thousand dogs escape from the shelter and make poo there.”

I love Leslie.

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Colorado Springs, still the Little London

WARNING: This post is cynical.

There's a hole in the world like a great black pit
and the vermin of the world inhabit it
and its morals aren't worth what a pig could spit
and it goes by the name of London.
At the top of the hole sit the privileged few
Making mock of the vermin in the lonely zoo
turning beauty to filth and greed...
I too have sailed the world and seen its wonders,
for the cruelty of men is as wondrous as Peru
but there's no place like London!
~ Sweeney Todd, “No Place Like London”.

Colorado Springs is known as Little London for a reason. There once was a distinct separation of class. It was almost a parody of a Dickens novel. Times have changed but it will always have the Little London moniker.

This town seems intent to prove that it's a cesspool. It is currently embroiled in a ludicrous battle. Girls Gone Wild shot a video at a local club and the Opportunists (see Blizzard post below) flashed their titties with abandon; the club was promptly and temporarily shut down.

The Opportunists brazenly defend the right of Opportunist Bimbos to flash their titties. "It is free speech," they scream. "Our Opportunist Bimbos have the right to flash those teeny things!" Let's all flash our titties, shall we? It's PC! It's bold! It's our American right to show how White Trash we are!

I did write: White Trash. Loud, braying, puffed up, Opportunist White Trash. Classless and base, repugnant and puerile substandard knobs.

People wonder why I don't have any sympathy for the girls who end up gang raped after a night at the club. Oh poor little girls. Next time please forget your right to free speech and use your common sense.

Aut, you're a bitch!

No, I am a realist. Why should American rights equate to the right to make an ass of yourself and then cry "unfair!" when shit hits your fan? Why should society bail anyone out of their own mistakes?

"Ok Ms. Jones, tell me again how you were raped."

"I flashed my Opportunist titties, and let him fondle them. I did it for the video camera."

"Ms. Jones, video camera? Do you mean the group known for the porn series Girls Gone Wild?"

"Yes. I was standing on the chair and I bounced up and down so they would jiggle, and I let him put both hands on them. Then I left, and in the parking lot the guy grabbed me from behind and dragged me into his car."

"But Ms. Jones, you let him fondle your breasts and bottom in public..."

"Yes, but I didn't mean it!"

Aut hasn't any sympathy. Were it a man whipping out his penis in that night club, he would have been removed.

Colorado Springs passionately defends the club and the GGW group. Feminists, are you soft in the head? The girls were used as clueless tools to promote drink sales and porn (by a company that has found itself in trouble in the past due to using minors in its films.) We wouldn't tolerate that shit a decade ago. We would smack down the penis thinkers. Of course, this generation wouldn't know self-respect if it were branded on their... parts.

Aut, you're so angry. Are you a fundie conservative?

No. I'm not angry, either. I am disgusted and outspoken about it. I'm liberal on far too many things, but I have always stood against porn when it involves foolish girls who unwittingly debase their bodies for the sake of being naughty. Become a porn star and get paid, if you must copulate on film. Sign a contract that will protect you. I certainly won't respect you: you're a man-slave and a tool.

Finally, I need to add that the authorites were in the club because they are cracking down on underage drinking in that specific location. This would indicate that some of the girls in that club might be (probably were) minors. That isn't to say that the Opportunist titties belonged to minors. It does indicate that minors were exposed to porn, which is a crime that they, and the club and the adult Opportunists, can be prosecuted for. Teen Arrested for Posting Nude Pics

But really, it's all about free speech.

There's a hole in the world like a great black pit
and it's filled with people who are filled with shit!
And the vermin of the world inhabit it!
~ Sweeney Todd, "No Place Like London"

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