My level of frustration is at an all-time high tonight. Truffle has been unable to keep any food down since we took ownership, and perhaps the problem was prevalent before we even picked her up. I do not know. I do know that she threw up during the car ride home, which I attributed to motion sickness. She seemed to do all right yesterday but threw up this morning, and again this evening.

I am not one to panic under normal circumstances. I did work as a veterinary technician nearly a decade ago. I do know the signs and symptoms of parvovirus and I am pleased to say that Truffles does not seem to have them (visually, not counting the vomiting itself.)

This leads me to wonder what could cause vomiting. She may have chewed up something and ingested a large enough part to cause an obstruction between the stomach and intestine. She would have had to chance upon this prior to our receiving her, as I do not keep toys about that can be easily chewed (as we have large dogs that could choke on a small toy or who might shred anything not made of industrial grade rubber.) We have no gravel that she could have eaten, or any rocks at all in our turnout area (which is actually an asphalt driveway with a little mud patch to the side.)

Coupled with this concern is the fact that she seems weaned on boiled poultry and does not eagerly eat kibble or boiled rice.

I combed out her undercoat and discovered that she is on the thin side, which may indicate that the problem has lasted for over a week. She has been lethargic all day today (an indication that she needs nourishment!)

I simply do not have answers and we do not have emergency vet services in this tiny town. I can only wait until tomorrow when our local vet opens his doors.

In the meantime, I have been worrying myself sick. I am not too proud to admit that I actually fell back on faith and laid hands on the sweet pup, begging God to give her strength and to allow us to find answers in time. Truffle rests in Zephyr’s bed, on the corner of my desk. Her breathing is even but my imagination tells me “it’s labored and she looks pathetically weak.” She is not at a pathetically weak stage, of course, but she does lack energy.

I am feeling intense anger at the moment. Why would anyone offer pups that may have medical complications? Why would anyone put an owner through this?

My disquiet stems from the years that I did work in the veterinary field. It also stems from past experiences with my own beloved pets. I know that diagnostics and treatment can run into the thousands. I also know that we do not have thousands (or even hundreds.) I am willing to try, however, if our vet is willing to let us make payments. She is too sweet a dog; she deserves a chance.

Thus begins my overnight vigil. I will remain awake to tend to her until we can get her in for an emergency exam. My challenge will not lie in remaining awake but in controlling my imagination.

Please excuse my complete lack of flair in this post. I am stressed out.

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